Upon completion of the coaching program to stop skin picking, I ask my clients to reflect on all they have learned and achieved. I was so impressed with this thoughtful answer from Bron, who not only brought her skin picking from completely out-of-control to extremely minimal, she learned a ton on her path to success. With her blessing, I share with you her reflection on the important qualities she developed during the program:
1. Courage: I think enrolling in this program was one of the most difficult life decisions I’ve made. Admitting that I am not strong enough on my own was challenging. What I realized through this though is that it actually has less to do with “strength” and more to do with commitment, learning, practice and belief.
2. Acceptance: When I finally understood that my picking was uncontrollable and destructive far beyond the damage I was doing to myself physically, I became desperate for everything to change DRASTICALLY and IMMEDIATELY. I have, during this program, come to learn that acceptance of where I am right now is more real and significant than achieving instant success (after all, there is no such thing as instant success ☺). It is beautiful to realize that there are some good days and some-not-so-good days and that neither are permanent but both contribute to building character.
3. Flexibility: My thinking has always been black and white, right and wrong, one way or the other – with no room for error (or for just being human). This program has challenged me to explore my emotions and personality with care, understanding the concept that the “gray area in between” is where my character is built. Inconsistency is part of being alive and while structure and planning is important, deviations do not translate to failure.
4. Gentleness: I have learned to start being more gentle with myself, and I think gentle with others. There is no need (or rather it is impossible) to be perfect. Balance is key, not perfection.
5. Perseverance: Sometimes I feel as if I am going backwards (there are days of stress and anxiety, where I want to and do slip into ways of coping which are comfortable). I understand, through developing a “toolbox” of skills in this program, that I don’t ever need to give up, I just have to keep trying.
6. Discipline: Putting skills into practice is one of the most difficult “actions” to take. Hurting myself became so easy and comfortable and sometimes I really crave how simple that was. However, I understand now that discipline is a habit, it takes time to develop, but once it is constant, it becomes easier.
7. Accountability: Knowing that I would be speaking to you (Annette) regularly, provided a safe platform for me to make sure I did my best to stay on track.
8. Humor: It has been great to learn that so much of my reasoning behind hurting myself has been ridiculous and not useful. I also see that I can be unnecessarily serious.
9. Hope: I didn’t believe in Hope before this program showed me that change is possible. I am more grateful than I have words for.
Dear reader, I hope you have found this helpful and inspiring. If you think you may like to learn more about my coaching program, please feel free to contact me. And sign up for my Freedom Kit (it’s free!) whether you are ready for coaching or not. You can also read testimonials from Bron and others here.
Love and support,